One mitten short of a pair

by

It’s not uncommon for some people to cycle in and out of our program. Often they have spurts of good luck where they’ve got a good job that leaves them with enough money to pay the bills. But then, just as each of our stories demonstrates, life throws some type of curveball to put them back to square one and in a place they never expected to be.

After 23 years of marriage my wife (Taylor) lost her battle with cancer. Losing her has been one of the hardest experiences I think I’ll ever face. I lost my mind for a while. With the grief of losing the love of my life and my best friend I barely want to get out of bed most days. But I’m slowly taking steps to re-building my life one piece at a time. I started going to counseling and got put on some medication to help my depression. This is helping me to accept that things will never be the same. It’s not easy to lose someone. Life doesn’t stop though. I’ve got to make the best out of the worst situation. Slowly I’m learning to cook, do laundry, and to clean the house while remembering to pay the bills. We were a great pair but now it’s just me.

Some days you probably come home wishing that the chaos would stop. Well what if it did? Think about it as if Taylor was your partner. You were there to drive to various appointments, carry them upstairs to bed at the end of the night when they’re too sick to walk, and been there to wipe away all the tears. Now who will wipe away your tears? Who will be there to support you through your struggle?

Not only does this situation put you in emotional turmoil but now you’re in financial stress. You’ve lost part of your income, since Taylor isn’t around to collect a pension anymore. Plus you’ve had additional expenses to cover the cost of the funeral, since you never had the money to save for it in the past.

Now your life has changed in a way that you never would have expected. You’re likely going to rely on food assistance and other social service programs until you can come to terms with the loss of your partner and figure out your finances again. It’s a big adjustment that you never wanted to plan for, but now you’re left without a choice. You’ve got to find a way to adjust to your new situation and pay the bills.

So in the mean time we’ll see you pass through our doors from time to time. We’ll hope that the food hamper will provide you with all the things you’re use to having available at home. And if not you’ll have to try to scrap together the money from somewhere, access another program, or simply go without. You know food banks are working on donations, which means sometimes certain items aren’t available. Either way you know it’s better to have some food than no food at all. That’s really your only choice in this situation; because let’s face it: the creditors and bills won’t stop just because your wife passed away. Instead you’re left to continue fighting to meet your basic needs and hoping that one day soon your struggle will come to an end.

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